“Sorry, I know I sound whimpy…”
“Haha, sorry, just got a little excited…”
“Sorry, I’m sorry that song makes me cry every time…”
“I’m sorry, I keep talking about him, he’s on my heart…”
Ever make excuses for the way you are? What you feel and how you look? Apologize for yourself to other people for doing nothing wrong? It’s like in your mind you aren’t reaching a standard – a standard that no one has actually set. If people were really sorry for the things they said, felt, or how behaved around other people they wouldn’t actually do those things. So they aren’t sorry necessarily, what they are really asking for is permission from the other person to act or feel a certain way. Acceptance. A casual phrase you hear in everyday conversation stems from a much deeper context: we are afraid to be who we were made to be.
What “I’m sorry…” is really saying is “Wait! Let me pause the conversation, make an excuse for the way God created me, cause I don’t want to offend anyone by walking in confidence of the way He made me to be.” Perhaps confidence should offend, or more accurately challenge those around us? Who are the leaders among us? Who are the people making a difference? They are the ones who are confident and unapologetic of who they are and what they stand for.
“I’m sorry…” puts the focus on us and takes it AWAY from God. Perhaps HE is the one most offended by us? He has saved us and is sanctifying us to be perfect as He is perfect – that it the redemptive process! Perfect means complete. Continually apologizing for ourselves and putting ourselves down is not humility – it is arrogance.
The way we continually talk about our own inabilities is an insult to our Creator. To complain over our incompetence is to accuse God falsely of having overlooked us. …how unbelievably inappropriate and disrespectful they [our words/perspectives] are to Him. We say things such as, “Oh, I shouldn’t claim to be sanctified; I’m not a saint.” But to say that before God means, “No, Lord, it is impossible for You to save and sanctify me; there are opportunities I have not had and so many imperfections in my brain and body; no, Lord, it isn’t possible.” That may sound wonderfully humble to others, but before God it is an attitude of defiance.
– Oswald Chambers
Humility is instead an accurate picture of how God sees us.
We are created in the image of God. Think that through for a minute! As with any beautiful painting or work of art you are signed by the Divine (Jesus Christ) – He has left His imprint on you. Made to be His witnesses and ambassadors, you are His signature here on earth. Wow. We are being transformed into His likeness. The more we know Him, the more we will reflect His glory, His divine signature.
It’s not prideful to be confident in bearing this signature. C.S. Lewis says “Humility is not thinking less of yourself – it’s thinking of yourself less.” It’s ok – right – even for us to know and understand who we are – who He is making us. There is even such a thing as a healthy pride: a stewardship responsibility that we are to have, not in what we have done – but as a reflection of what He has done in us. Isak Dinesen says,
Pride is faith in the idea that God had when he made us. A proud man is conscious of the idea, and aspires to realize it. He does not strive towards a happiness or a comfort, which may be irrelevant to God’s idea of him. His success is the idea of God, successfully carried through, and he is in love with his destiny.
That is what a holy confidence looks like.
We apologize and make excuses for who we are or what we feel all the time because we don’t see ourselves as God sees us. (Even in jest.) The self-apologies are really arrogance and insecurity hiding behind false humility.
So how do we stop apologizing for ourselves? The first step is to listen to yourself and those around you. I think you’ll be shocked how often you’ll hear those phrases. (I have been at myself!) When you hear yourself making an apology out of this false humility, repent of the wrong view of yourself and remember God’s view of you – the imperfect being made perfect. Ask Him to show you who He says you are. The KEY to walking in confidence is knowing the One whose image you are supposed to reflecting.
Why then is it so mandatory for us to know God now? The reason is that man is made in God’s image; therefore, no person can love God, or walk with God until He knows God. To the degree that we know Him will be determined everything about us. God has made Himself knowable, but only in certain areas. His purpose in doing that was for our own good. When those few revelations of God’s incomprehensible character are grasped, man’s own character will begin to be altered. We are what we worship. It’s God’s life that we want, not human life trying to be godly.”
–Dan Dehann, The God You Can KNOW. [A must read!]
We are changed through knowing Him.
How well do you know Him? Not know about Him, but KNOW Him? Christians are most often the worst self-apologists. Brothers and Sisters this shouldn’t be so! Let’s know Him more and change that!