Not Unredeemed

… living the beautiful tension between what is, and what will be …

When You Say “I Do” – You Get Me Too

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IMG_3064The pen scratched the paper in a smooth rhythm as I signed my name. It was official. Sarah and Eric were now legally married and my signature and presence witness that agreement. Sarah and Eric chose each other, and I chose to stand with them.

Being a Bridesmaid, or a Maid-of-Honor, is not just a wonderful excuse to wear a pretty dress, or even to enter in a couple’s joy with them. It is a silent commitment; a promise and a choice to stand with this couple and go the distance of life with them. I’m committing to walking out life with them, to honor them, support them, and hold them accountable. To encourage them in the Lord and be there with them no matter what life throws their way. My hope and prayer for them is to be healthy inviduals first, and then as a couple. When they say ‘I do’ to each other and they ask me to be there? Well, they get me too!

Why would I want to choose to run the distance with the couple’s whose weddings I’ve been in? Is it because I hold to the tradition of witnessing the marriage? In part, yes. But mostly I choose to go the distance with them, because Jesus chooses to go the distance with me. And therefore it’s an honor to be asked to go the distance with others.

““I choose you.” This is the foundation of true lasting relationships. It’ is the foundation for God’s relationship with you. As Jesus declared to is disciples, ‘ You did not choose Me, but I chose you…’ Jesus chose you.” – Danny Silk  from Keep Your Love On

Jesus chose you! He chose me. Chose to pursue me through the pain of the cross, through my joys, and my sorrows, through sickness and in health, Jesus has consistently pursued me in His love. He now leaves me with a choice – will I choose Him back? When I’m angry at Him, will I turn to Him, or from Him? Run to Him with my joys and sorrows, or try to hide what I’m feeling from Him?

Choice and commitment are not limited to physical marriage. They are the basis of every healthy relationship. Jesus chose you. Will you choose Him back? The Gospel does not limit commitment and choice to a physical marriage covenant. Jesus invites all of us to choose Him back, to commit to the marriage covenant of the Lamb. To be the bride of Christ. Being single and fully alive means that I am aware that every day I have chosen and committed to pursue intimacy, communication, and love with Jesus Christ.

It’s because Jesus has chosen to go the distance of life with me, that I can choose to do the same with the people and friendships I commit to and love. Sometimes this might look like being a  bridesmaid, but more often than not, it’s quietly choosing to love those around me the way Christ loves me.


Singles, you are not left out of a covenant of love. Jesus chose you, and is giving you opportunities to practice commitment every day. Will you choose Him back today?

Today's the Day: Being Single and Fully Alive “When You Say “I Do” You Get Me Too is a part of the “Today’s The Day: Being Single and Fully Alive” a 31 Days Series. To read more from this series please click here.

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Author: notunredeemed

Jesus follower, people lover, truth scribbler. Addicted to pain (growth). Passionate about relationships, identity and the transforming power of Christ.

One thought on “When You Say “I Do” – You Get Me Too

  1. My question to you, then, in regard to this post is what does this practically look like to you? “walking out life with them, to honor them, support them, and hold them accountable. To encourage them in the Lord and be there with them no matter what life throws their way.” In walking in life with any couple, sister and brother-in-law or otherwise, at least in this context, does imply to me anyway that it’s the couple’s responsibility to seek (if needed) you as an accountability partner for this. But does it also mean that even if not sought out, you as a responsible accountability partner seek them out when there are issues or things in your opinion to be addressed? To borrow from Rob Bell loosely, it can be a fine line as to what remains “under the chuppah” throughout marriage.


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